My fall, my choices, and my reminder
Thursday, August 12th, 2010
By: Brandon Bailor
Last June (2009) I had what I am referring to as a life changing event. It was what I feel to be an extreme low point in my life. I call it my “fall” … metaphorically as well as literally. It was a colossal blunder, a stupid mistake that actually ended up physically hurting me. I am just eternally thankful I didn’t hurt anyone else. I spent the next few months beating myself up about it. Punishing myself if you will. I was so broken that I probably should have gone to seek professional help. I did however rely on the fact that driving is therapy to me. In August and October, I was able to circle the entire US twice, and take multiple weekend trips throughout the greater North East. Then in November I made it down to Florida to visit a friend, and by that point, I had driven through all of the lower 48 states in the calendar year 2009. It was a lot of driving. From 7/1/2009 to 7/14/2010 I put over 51,000 miles on my car. I think the therapy was successful.
Based on this event, and the inordinate amount of driving therapy, I decided to make a few life changing decisions. Live my life differently. I promised myself a few things. Some were easy, and some were difficult. One of my promises I sort of ended up breaking. In hopes of a “normal” life, I strayed, and decided to try something. I shouldn’t have. So, I have since rectified that situation, and I have resolved myself to hold true to all of my decisions.
In order to stick to these decisions, I decided to create a daily reminder for myself. Something that I will be forced to see every day. Something permanent that will follow me wherever I go so I will not have a chance to hide from my newly chosen life. It has taken almost a year to complete, but it is finally done. A few of my close friends have been involved, and have helped me along the way, but for the most part, this is a very private matter. So private in fact, that even my closest friends do not know all of the promises I made to myself. For this reason, this reminder is not on public display. It is my personal reminder, and will remain private.
It has been over a year since my fall. My reminder is complete, and seems to be serving it’s purpose very well. So far so good.
Category : General
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